Talking about Catullus

Our readers group met on Friday to talk about Catullus. We spent two hours laughing and praising his work and his character. We began with the first poem of the surviving collection:

Who do I give this neat little book to

all new and polished up and ready to go?

You, Cornelius, because you always thought

there was something to this stuff of mine,

and were the one man in Italy with guts enough

to lay out all history in a couple of pages,

a learned job, by god, and it took work.

So here's the book, for whatever it's worth

I want you to have it. And please, goddess,

see that it lasts for more than a lifetime.

I said how much I liked the poem because Catullus praises the accomplishments of Cornelius. A. asked why that strengthens the poem and pointed out how Catullus often brought in other characters, so there was a trio: the poem, others, and the listeners. I said it made Catullus less of a big I-am.

L. said, his changing focus, quickened the poem. I agreed. Even when he expresses grief, he doesn't get mired in it. In a poem mourning his dead brother, he apologizes to a friend for seeming to ignore him:

Still for all my grief, Hortalus, I send you

these translations of some verse by Callimachus,

so you won't think that what you said to me just

slipped from the vague wandering fog in my mind

the way an apple her boy friend sent her in secret

pops right out of a girl's innocent young breast

because, the poor thing, she forgot all about it

under her dress and jumped up when mother came in,

there it goes bouncing across the floor, her face

is red, so she's so ashamed of herself and could cry.

We followed the poet, delighted when he veered from grief to the description of the young girl and the secret apple. The opposite of obsession, when the mind is locked in an endlessly repeating refrain.

There was so much to admire: his intimate, vital tone, his elegant lines, the way he talks to himself:

So why keep torturing yourself anymore?

Come on now, get tough, get yourself together,

the gods don't want your misery, so quit it.

He is withering on Julius Caesar and Caesar's right hand man, Mamurra. 'This could be a poem about Cheney and Bush,' L. said. Yes, but not the sex. I can't imagine them ever lusting for little girls.

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They're beautiful together, the odd couple,

Mamurra, and Caesar his queen.

Naturally. you get two splats of shit together,

one from the city, the other from Formiae,

and you can never wash them off.

One's as sick as the other, twin diseases

in their little bed, with their little minds,

and both still fuck-hungry besides,

beating each other out after little girls.

They're beautiful together, the odd couple.

In poem 12, Catullus shames, teases and berates Asinius for stealing Catullus's prized napkins, gifts from his dearest friends:

It's not nice to use your left hand like that

at the table, Asinius, everybody busy laughing

and drinking, and you stealing their napkins.

You think it's funny? Guess again, creep . . .

I suggested that after Thanksgiving dinner, each of us write a poem in the spirit of Catullus to the creepiest of the guests. If not at Thanksgiving, after another occasion. Will we be as outspoken as Catullus?

Familiar Strangers

On my daily walk I usually pass this Cyrus Dallin statue. Lately I'm more interested in the familiar strangers I see who are usually out of doors when I am. Today I saw the elderly Muslim couple. She wears a head covering and a long dress. I worry about her. Her coat is not heavy enough for the cold weather, and her shoes are thin-soled sandals. I watched as she held on to her husband's arm and walked down Pleasant Street. Unlike Americans, they stroll, as if they were on the Corniche, gazing at the sea.

When I reached the Starbucks in Arlington Center, I saw the teenage couple with their infant baby. They are so terribly young. Bundled in winter coats--hers pink--they sat at an outdoor table and wheeled the baby back and forth and jiggled the carriage as they sipped their drinks. I've seen them every day this week. The father is fair with large eyes and a Roman nose--a face like the one of Alexander the Great stamped on so many silver coins. Sitting near them was a large man with long brown disheveled hair who sits outside Starbucks every day of the year. He speaks to some of the regulars. Sometimes he seems stunned. We exchange glances but we don't speak.

Tomorrow when I go out I will see other familiar strangers. Maybe some of them, over the weeks and months and years, have gotten used to seeing me.

Catullus (84-54 BC)

The Roman poet Catullus is famous for his love poems to Lesbia, "Let's you and me live it up, my Lesbia, Viuamus, mea Lesbia . . . " He is also famous for his wildly profane language:

Up your ass and in your mouth

Aurelius, you too Furius, you cocksuckers

calling me dirt because my poems

have naughty naughty words in them.

But right now I'm interested in the direct, engaging way Catullus begins a poem and plan to copy him. Here are some of his openers:

Hello, sparrow . . .

Just how many kisses do I want . . .

You feel bad, Catullus, but quit acting stupid . . .

Calvus, old buddy . . .

Aurelius, you father of every hunger . . .

Look Thallus, you fat little fairy . . .

Listen kid, go bring us something/ decent to drink . . .

I hate her and I love her . . .

You're invited to a feast, Fabullus, my place . . .

Lively, profane, irreverent, the most secular of ancient poets, Catullus speaks with what Bunuel called "virile insolence." He insults Caesar:

I've no big wish to please you, Caesar,

or to know who or what the hell you are.

I know very little Latin, but the liquidity of Catullus's lines comes through: Mellitos oculos tuos, Iuuenti . . . Your honeyed eyes, Juventius.

Next week we'll be talking about Catullus in our readers group. I've succumbed to his charms and won't say a word against him.

He was born in Verona, where this Roman road has been worn smooth, and died too young.

Family Reunion

Tomorrow I'll be with my cousins in New Jersey. I grew up in Passaic, where my family lived on Lucille Place, a few steps from the apartment house in the picture. When my cousins and I are together we're seldom nostalgic for the past. We tell jokes and talk about the present. A while back there was some talk about putting together a family tree but no one's done anything about it. Like all families, ours began long ago, but we have few records, only a paper with information about my grandfather's becoming an American citizen.

I'm grateful that he and my grandmother had the good sense to leave Europe. They had lived in a village, probably Jalowka, near Bialystok. From a population of approximately 800 Jews in Jalowka, there is a record of only one Jew surviving the Nazis. Most of them died in the gas chambers in Treblinka. There are no Jews now in Jalowka, still a rural village.

I've read that Jalowka is one of the best places to see the European Roller bird and like to think that my grandmother saw this brilliant blue bird. She was fond of blue and grew Heavenly Blue morning glories. Each blossom lasts only one day.

Workers: Sit Down

Years ago when I worked in a department store in downtown Passaic, New Jersey, the clerks were not allowed to sit down, except during short breaks. We were on our feet for most of the eight-hour shift.

Clerks and cashiers are still on their feet. They were lined up at their registers yesterday when I went to TJ Maxx; they were on their feet--most of them middle-aged and older--at the supermarket. The workers stand in toll booths; they stand in banks; they stand at cosmetic counters. They stand, their faces tense, and tell us to "have a nice day."

Things are different in France. I was amazed to see cashiers in the Casino supermarket in Aix ringing up our groceries and wine as they sat in comfortable swiveling seats. They smiled. Not one of them told me to have a nice day.

It might take a revolution before clerks can sit on the job in the United States. Think of how difficult it has been to insure that we all have health care.

Cape Cod Reading

It was pouring rain when we left Arlington for a two-hour ride to West Falmouth. I was to read with Susan Donnelly and Fan Ogilvie for the Calliope series at the West Falmouth Library. Driving in a nor'easter is rough. Wind whipped rain against the windows; trucks sent up spray, which splattered against the windshield with a loud, wet noise. I was jumpy until we got to the Bourne Bridge. Traffic crept: there had been an accident.

It was still raining hard when we got to the library. I pulled up my hood and went inside. There were people! The wood-paneled room was warm, and there was wine. There was a children's corner.

Thanks to the fine work of Alice Kociemba , coordinator of the series, there was an audience of regulars. There's Alice in front of the fireplace.

We waited for Fan Ogilvie, who was coming from Martha's Vineyard, and learned her boat had been cancelled because of rough seas. Alice read from her chapbook. A phrase stays with me, "the rhythm of the day-dreaming soul." Susan Donnelly's poem,"The Fifties," gave us a picture of "What We Wore":

From the neck down

we were fortressed

with guy ropes and wires.

Plastic splints

pushed up our small,

worried breasts. We hooked

dress shields

over the smears

of Secret. From our waists

hung garters,

with rigging that

stroked our thighs.

Rubber girdles, crinolines,

sanitary belts

like holy medals.

I autographed a book for Susan, congratulating her on escaping the rigging.

It snowed on the way home but I wasn't nervous. I got into the "rhythm of the day-dreaming soul." Soon we were home and eating a dinner of curry and rice. Just enough heat in the spice.

Please tell me about your reading experiences.

On

When I'm about to leave the house and music is playing, particularly ravishing music--Bach, Dawn Upshaw, Chet Baker--I do not turn off the radio. I take my keys, my camera, and wallet, and with my cell phone clipped to my waistband go out the door and down the driveway, pleased with myself as if I had done something remarkable. I don't leave the radio on for security, unlike a friend who used to leave his radio on to frighten away thieves.

The other day as I walked away from my house to the sound of "Night in Tunisia," I thought about leaving things on, not just the radio. All the books I've loved are still on, still playing. The volume is turned down but will increase if I open the book and read. The paintings that turned me on are still on. The ink still seems fresh on the letters my mother wrote to me: "Dearest Miriam, I want to tell you I can enjoy life again. My vital signs are good."

A few blocks away, the Buddhist monks have made a sand painting. On October 21 they will perform "The ceremony of dissolution." They will destroy the painting. I can't be like them. I want things to go on.